It’s hard to believe we are teetering on final quarter of the year. For me, it’s time for reassessments. Am I going to accomplish what I set out to do in January? Generally the answer is “no” which leads to the question: What can I accomplish before the end of the year without turning into a basket case? I’ve been told that’s one of the pitfalls of being an eldest sister. Eldest sisters, particularly those with working mothers are overly responsible, goal-oriented and guilt-ridden when failing to meet their goals. But you know what? I think I’m on the mend. Perhaps it’s age.
For example, this year I vowed to:
- Collect my stories and edit, edit, edit the crap out of them
- Get more involved with the community
- Hire a gardener; a handyman; and an electrician
- Bronze a few of my sculptures with money my mother left me for such a purpose
- Republish my second book.
Of all those lofty goals, I accomplished just one. The last one.
I must admit, it felt good to release the story to the world. Really good, considering that I began writing about the wacky world of mein Oncle Boob over thirty years ago.
As for my other goals, well the world will not end if I don’t finish them. It might end … considering how everything is going … but it won’t be because I did not hire an electrician.
Tomorrow I flip the page to a new month on the Wasabi calendar. Any guesses as to which flowering. plant is featured? Here’s a clue: it’s native to Japan where it is considered a great delicacy.
Saying nothing in particular 
You accomplished more goals than this oldest sister did in 2025, Jan! Your post reminds me to do some writing today and also buy your repubbed book! As you know, I loved The Graduation Present and look forward to rereading it with your updates. And I really like the new cover!
Thanks Mary. It’s the same story but told from a different POV. So far just getting through a day without feeling total despair and grief is an accomplishment! I’m no longer on FB but I did really enjoy hearing about your denim accessories. I keep hoping I’ll get back East at some time but so far it hasn’t worked out. Are you on Instagram?
The best thing about goals is, if you are the one who made them, then you can be the one who can decide how to enforce them if at all…what did John Lennon says? “life is what happens while you’re busy doing other things”
This is true! But leaving behind that work ethic after retirement can take a while.
I watched/read Tracks recently and saw a similar theme to this post in the movie and the book. Robyn Davidson, the young woman trekking in the desert, hooked up with an aborigine and ended up throwing away her alarm clock. His concept of time was way more suited for the Australian bush than an alarm clock. Which begs the question: why did she bring an alarm clock? Seems she set goals and allotted herself so many hours to achieve them. When she wasn’t successful, which happened regularly, she was frustrated. The aborigine pointed out that far from failing, she was communing with the spirits of nature and animals (her camels and dog) with every step she took. Plus, she was on an epic journey which would bring her great insights. It reminded me of not being able to see the forest for the trees. I’ve tried to hone that thought over the years and have found some forgiveness for my inefficiency and various fuck ups in the vastness of my undertakings. Duke
Well put Duke. But we weren’t raised by bushmen unfortunately. The best we can do is, as you said, forgive ourselves for the inefficiency and various fuck ups in the vastness of our undertakings! I think I’ll stitch that in my pillow case!
Hope you watch the movie, it will make you feel better. The book is just as good, but more informative. The movie is a poem, the book is a stirring memoir. Duke
One out of six ain’t bad 😄💜💜💜
I’m finally learning that if the wiring in a room we rarely use is iffy or the garden isn’t picture perfect, it isn’t worth fretting about!
This is so true! And I guess it’s age that helps us learn this.
i have to say …I love the photo of you and your siblings 💜💜💜
Onward, one way or another!
Truly!
My Favorite party of this post was this: ” What can I accomplish before the end of the year without turning into a basket case?”
because isn’t this at the heart of productivity, output, and goal reaching.
Look at you in your saddle shoes and sassy little hat. I love it!
Well, at least you have accomplished one item on the list. It’s better than nothing at all. But life should always be about enjoyment. So, enjoy it whatever you do. If it becomes a chore, it’s worth reconsidering it.
You’re absolutely right. I’m finally getting over working on a schedule, with checklists and the whole shebang. It’s take a while though!
I don’t do New Year’s goals. That way I always reach my goals. LOL.
Loved, just loved your picture… I must admit that our youngest sister had two mothers, her real mother and her elder sister. Having said that, the sisters were and still are incredibly close… (Makes me very happy)
Take care Jan
I am also an eldest sister. Admittedly I led the pack and they all followed. They never said I wasn’t their mother either. My mom was not prone to sitting on the henhouse roof making shell people. 🤣😂
I think my mother liked to pit us against each other by generally taking their side in any disagreement.
😱💛
Incredible to think that 2026 is just around the corner. I’m holding on to summer until September 22, but I’m also looking forward to fall, the cooler weather and all the orange colors that will soon surround me.
You and me both although our summer has been really nice.
Which is a lot. Don’t you think we’re sometimes too hard on ourselves?
Yeah – I spend more time beating myself up than I do just getting on with my list!
There you go.